Save My Marriage And Rekindle The Flame
"My wife cheated on me and I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel. I still love her and I believe she loves me. I'm just so hurt that I haven't been able to make a decision as to whether or not I should try to save my marriage."
When a married person discovers his or her partner is involved in an illicit relationship, it seems like the end of the world. It triggers of sense of betrayal, abandonment, and loss of trust. The guilty partner can also experience a sense of devastation at the possibility that this reckless behavior may have forever alienated a still beloved spouse.
Marriage counselors can also sometimes help marital partners find answers inside themselves. While one should not look to excuse a partner's illicit affair or take the blame for that affair on oneself, it may also be true that both partners had a hand in sabotaging the relationship. It can sometimes be important to look at the relationship before the unfaithful behavior to discover how it ended up where it did.
"I think our marriage can get through this. I decided that I'm just going to carry on and ignore it in order to save my marriage." "She's a good person; I'll deal with being bored; I want to save my marriage." Suppressing your feelings about a spouse's affair and forcing yourself to be content with the hand you've been dealt isn't really saving your marriage. Making empty promises to be faithful and faking your satisfaction also probably isn't the most effective manner in which to deal with what has happened.
People often assume that once there is love and basic needs are being met the marriage will take care of itself. In reality, a marriage even an apparently happy one, requires hard work. Communication, both verbal and non-verbal is an essential marital nutrient. A therapist, specialized in marital counseling, can be helpful if the couple is finding it difficult to start and maintain healthy communication.
If one partner is resistant to therapy, it is still beneficial for at least one member of the pair to seek help. Ideally, the therapist will promote emotional health, which should help the individual improve his or her personal emotional state. This should contribute to an emotionally viable environment in the home, which is elemental to good marital help.
Seems like those days are over, marriages last less and less everyday and people often find themselves asking how to save my marriage? One way to salvage a marriage is to work it out. Marriage counseling has even become a very lucrative business. Marriage counselors know how to save marriage and help married couples work through their problems and differences. Even though they may seem expensive, they are well worth it if they can help save your marriage. The value of personal services that can help restore stability and bring understanding into an otherwise doomed marriage is priceless.
Published January 23rd, 2008
Filed in Marriage